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They negotiate the rules of play and find assurance that both women definitely desire one another's husbands.
Like every swinger I spoke with, the husband wants his wife to truly want to do it, never to be forced or pressured. It's a phrase people always hear about marriage, but here it's absolute.
It's what piqued their interest in "the lifestyle" and locked them in for life.
But the same questions seemed to evolve for everyone: What are swingers? You might imagine it's men who are begging their wives to swing, but in many cases, it's actually who want to try swinging.
Part one of my swingers article "The Surburban Swingers Club" took you behind the scenes of a DC-area swingers club.
One woman said swinging is all about being able to pleasure another woman. Related: 5 Sex Sites To Visit STAT If You're A Curious Swinger Katherine, one thirty-something wife, tries to explain the woman-to-woman attraction.
"Women are soft, sensual, and usually very responsive.
Positions change, but "it's normal sex — it's just that four people are there," Dave explains.
When it's over, they get dressed, make small talk, and go back up to the bar to drink and chat with friends.
Neither spouse fell in love with someone new, and the marriage didn't suffer but instead became stronger.
They soon found house parties are happening out there, too, if you know where to look.
Dave also uses this time to figure out how close the other couple is and whether or not the guy may be using his wife to get his own action. The men swap wives and "play" with one another's spouse one-on-one.